Not so good news

OK, where do I start - this could be a long one

So, I 've been having throat problems for about a month now, it started with an infection, which the doctors sorted but I went back last week, as she'd suggested, and my throat at the back left was still painful. She had a look down and thought it might be a lesion (???). She took a swab - at which point I nearly puked all over her - to test for any more infections. she told me to come back back in a week, she wanted this sorted. I asked her 'could this be something serious, should I be worried?' at which point her head and shoulders dropped, she had a pitiful look on her face and said 'lets just see what happens next week' - not quite the answer I was looking for, but I know that have to cover their backs.

So I went back this Wednesday, she had another look, and not it wasn't any better. She looked at a form in a folder and said 'well you do tick all the boxes on this form' and then proceeded to put the form on the desk - I stupidly glanced at it to read 'URGENT REFERRAL - HEAD AND THROAT CANCER'. She saw me looking and after I'd said 'OH MY GOD!!' rather shocked she said she didn't want to panic, but knew I would. She really doesn't know what's wrong with my throat but by eliminating cancer they can work down from there. By the end of the day the hospital had already called and I have an appointment next Thursday morning to see the throat and mouth specialist.

So - your doctor says try not to panic, but you've just seen the word - in bold and capitals - CANCER!!!!! I am trying to keep calm, especially round Daisi and Max, but every know and then I walk off and have an ickle weep - I'm quite sure the doc is right and it's just something else, but there's always that doubt in your mind. I do keep trying to think that even if it is the C word, they will have caught it quick and can sort it out - I've even worked out what colour wig I'd want if it came to that!!!!

So there you have it - not great and then 7 days of panic!!!!